Stuff You're Too Old For.

Ending a sentence with a preposition since 2010

Cupid.

If you don't reach a certain level of maturity, someone is going to send you to jail for a long time for shooting people with arrows and exposing your genitals, you sociopathic shithead baby.

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Filed under: Stuff you're too old for., , , , , , , , , ,

Having a goatee.

To: This a-hole
From: Baby Jesus
RE: Your new goatee.
Dearest a-hole,
I hope you learn how to grow a full beard and/or die in a car crash.
Your’s eternally,
Baby-J .

Filed under: Stuff you're too old for., , , , , , , ,

Vomiting.

If there is a heaven, you don't belong there because you're a bulimic douche bag in a bee costume who needs to grow the f' up.

Filed under: Stuff you're too old for., , , , , , , , , , ,

Pizza parties.

"Grow up and do coke like an adult" - comedian Daniel Tosh

Filed under: Uncategorized, , , , , , , ,

Getting nose bleeds.

Way to go, asshole. Now, everyone is uncomfortable.

Filed under: Stuff you're too old for., , , , , ,

Being a volunteer EMT.

Go to college and be a real doctor, you perverts.

Filed under: Stuff you're too old for.

Sleigh riding.

You're too old for that and you look like a fascist whore.

Filed under: Stuff you're too old for.

Wearing mittens.

Go buy a pair of real gloves, you selfish jerk baby.

Filed under: Stuff you're too old for.

Objects that look like faces.

You need to grow up mailbox, just do your job and stop fucking around.

Filed under: Uncategorized

Glasses.

Buy some contact lenses, those glasses make you look like a chinese little girl.

Filed under: Stuff you're too old for., , , ,

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