Stuff You're Too Old For.

Ending a sentence with a preposition since 2010

Playing with Your Food.

925 Million hungry people in the world......? Let's make some muthafuckin pancake masks!

And for other food related revelations check out GO Guilty Pleasures!

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Make believe.

Your blood may be a tiger's, but everything else belongs to a crazy person.

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St. Patrick’s Day

Jesus didn't chase the snakes out of France for this...

While we’re on the topic of drinking, check out It’s 7am Somewhere.

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Holding hands.

You need to stop letting the world know how emotionally dependent you are on others and cut the umbilical cord. Quite frankly, you look kind of gay.

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Cupid.

If you don't reach a certain level of maturity, someone is going to send you to jail for a long time for shooting people with arrows and exposing your genitals, you sociopathic shithead baby.

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Having a goatee.

To: This a-hole
From: Baby Jesus
RE: Your new goatee.
Dearest a-hole,
I hope you learn how to grow a full beard and/or die in a car crash.
Your’s eternally,
Baby-J .

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Vomiting.

If there is a heaven, you don't belong there because you're a bulimic douche bag in a bee costume who needs to grow the f' up.

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Pizza parties.

"Grow up and do coke like an adult" - comedian Daniel Tosh

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Getting nose bleeds.

Way to go, asshole. Now, everyone is uncomfortable.

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